“I need to workout out, I hate my body”
“why am so big!!”
I started to notice that I was spending so much time thinking and hating my physical appearance. I was heavier than I had ever been and to make it worst I was around women who were extremely fit and very beautiful at work. I started to feel a little insecure about my looks and my weight, and it had become a constant struggle. I also hated going to the gym with my husband, for fear of him seeing other physically fit women. It was awful, I had allowed Satan to control my thoughts, and it was making me a mess.
So naturally, what did I start to do? I was focusing all of my mental resources on the facts of what I didn’t have, big calves, smooth legs, tight stomach, clear face, and list can go on and on. I thought about that stuff all day long, I would think
If I was fit, then I would be happy
If I just lost 10 pounds, then everything would be good
If I could just workout consistently, then I will lose weight, and I would have the body I want
If I didn’t have acne, my face would be so much nicer
These desires didn’t start off as bad desires, it is good to be healthy and to be fit, it is good to take care of your skin, but when that desire was not meant the way I saw fit, then as James said, “my desires started to wage war within me”. (James 4:1-3)
Why Wage War?
War starts to escalate because of our motives. What were my motives, to satisfy self? They were not to worship God, with my abilities. Nor were they to bring God glory, or to praise his name in his help of empowering me with discipline? NO, it was all for selfish gain. If I was skinny I would be happy, ladies what a lie Satan had entrapped me in.
So then what did these motives give root to next? Unfulfilled motives and desires lead to envy, comparison, competitiveness, lack of self-esteem, insecurity about my body and my looks, insecurity about my husband because I feared he might look elsewhere. This list can go on and on, because it was all rooted in a false view of beauty, it was the worldly view of beauty I was buying into.
In a culture that glorifies satisfaction of self, I to believed these lies and my primary pursuit became about self. These thoughts, attitudes and behaviors that were once desires, evolved into an Idol. Physical fitness and beauty had become an idol in my life.
What is an Idol
First we must define what is an idol? It is the deed of the heart, and it is anything that takes the place or fulfillment of God. It is anything that you seek after to fulfill, satisfy, or want more than God. It is when you “exchange truth for a lie, so you worship and serve created things rather than the Creator” (Rom. 1:25). We must remember out motive and our desires must be from God and not the world.
Lie vs Truth
If I was fit, I’d be happy || ” You fill me with joy when I am in your presence” (Psalms 16:11)
If I just lost 10 lbs. everything would be great || “When my anxiety (fear) was great, your consolation brought joy” (Psalms 94:19)
If I just workout hard, I’ll have the body I want || “You were bought at a price, therefore honor God (who me? no God) with my body” (1 Corinthians 6:20)
How can I know if this desire Is for Self
- Am I willing to sin to get this?
- Am I looking for security, comfort, happiness, fulfillment or joy in this?
- What do I pray for?
- Do I turn to this as refuge and comfort instead of Christ?
- What would make you happy?
Now evaluate your heart, are your answers to the questions ones that make you more holy? Or are your answers proving to you that you want something else more than holiness? As believers are hearts are not of the world anymore, and we must deal RADICALLY with our worldly desires and motives. We must seek after holiness!
What is holiness?
1 Peter 1:13-23, tells us that holiness is a behavior
- Obedience to the Father
- Faithfully committing to Him
- Emulate the Father in our thoughts, hearts, and actions
- Throw off worldly desires
- Say NO to the Flesh
How do we Obtain Holiness
Peter tells us in the 1st chapter to start with these-
- Intimate Fellowship with God
- SUBMIT to Him
- Learning and believing in His Word
- Love one another
- Place your Faith and Hope in God
What is next
- Prayerfully Examine your heart
- Identify if fitness and physical beauty have become an Idol (or if anything else has)
- If so confess
- Work with God- He will remove that idol from your heart (1 John 5:15) “He will answer”
- Share your idols with an accountability partner, ask them for prayer!